Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Plug It Up! Plug It Up! Plug It Up!

Okay, this is my last post on television commercials for a while, I promise. (I'm working on a new post for tomorrow that's, shall we say, explosive. It won't be for the weak of stomach.)

Today's Commercial of Interest is for Tampax Pearl tampons. You know, the one where a heterosexual couple are sitting in a boat in the middle of a lake which has apparently sprung a leak -- a leak which can be conveniently plugged with a Tampax Pearl tampon. (Just typing that sentence kinda made me all skeevy, but really, there didn't seem to be other words for the actual act of filling the hole of a leaking boat.) (That parenthetical sentence just kinda grossed me out too. Let's face it, there's no way to talk about the whole concept of comparing a leak in a boat to a woman's menstrual period without sounding gross.)

Ladies, I'm curious: Do you really carry around ENTIRE BOXES of tampons with you when you climb into a boat with your man of romantic interest? "Wow, this is so romantic... nature, the lake... let me make sure I bring with me EIGHTEEN TAMPONS."

For that matter, do you really carry around ENTIRE BOXES of tampons ANYWHERE other than on your return trip from the drugstore?

Not that I know much about the subject of feminine hygiene, but it seems to me that if you feel the need to carry around EIGHTEEN TAMPONS, perhaps you should be looking into more "heavy flow" products.

And man, that must suck. Your honey takes you away for a romantic weekend (or week, or whatever) at the lake, and it happens to be the week of your cycle. I know some guys are "cool with" doing The Nasty while their women are, uh, camped out in The Red Tent, but most of the women I know aren't all that keen on the idea, so ew. Ew ew ew.

This is along the same lines as women who like to take sunset walks on the beach with their mother to ask them if they douche. The mother, of course, happens to be carrying a bottle of douche with her at the time.

You ladies and the things you carry around. You crack me up. Or gross me out. Right now I can't tell which.


Will said...

I got no problem having sex while she's in the red zone.

anne said...

If tampons (all big boxes of them) were the only thing that are handily carried around at all times for advertising purposes. I'd make a list, but obviously it all skips my mind right now.

Steve said...

I already had my comment in mind as I was getting to the end of your post, and, damn if you didn't say it in the last paragraph. I'm am sooo, totally grossed out right now, and it's dinner time. Ewww.

p.p. said...


I have actually thought about this too while watching the commercial. Good post!

I would have to disagree with Will.

Dennis! said...

Will: Ew. Ew ew ew.