Friday, June 03, 2005

The Money-Man Equivalence

"The pay-as-you-go tax system sucks."


"The pay-as-you-go tax system. It rapes the common worker. Typically, the government takes too much from each individual taxpayer, holds on to it for up to a year without interest, then returns it to you in April, without interest."


"It makes more sense for me to hold on to my damn money all year, invest it for a decent return, then pay the government what I owe them."

"That's great in theory. But it only works if you know you'd actually earn money on your investments. If the past is any indication, if I were permitted to try to invest any money that should be earmarked for taxes, I'd instead end up losing money."


"Let's go out for a drink."

"I think I'll pass. I have beer at home. It's cheaper for me to stay home with my own brewskies. Why should I pay $5 for a beer when for $7 I can get a great microbrew SIX-pack?"

"You don't meet people if you don't go out for drinks."

"That's great in theory. But it only works if you know that you'd actually meet people in the bars. If the past is any indication, I could spend $40 at the bar tonight and still not say a word to anyone but you."


kat said...

I'm having fun trying to figure out which is you. If the second conversation's responses are totally smart-ass, then my money's on Dennis!

Will said...

bars are overrated, very overrated. Unless they have good music.

Dennis! said...

Kat: Actually, they're both me. If the government didn't take tax money before giving me my earnings, I wouldn't have anything left pay taxes with come tax time. And I never meet anyone when I go to bars. Because I'm antisocial that way.

Matthew said...

Attempting to meet people in bars is typically bad news, anyway.

One of my friends would always get entangled with guys he'd meet out at bars (and these were 'romantic' entanglements, not sexual). Eventually, each of these relationships would fall apart. He finally asked me for some advice.

My response was: 'Well, for one thing, you're going to Burger King in search of steak, and instead you're getting hamburger, because that's what BK has to offer. Don't go to BK looking for steak.'

He liked that. :-)