In a City This Big....
Remember this guy?
It's okay. I'll wait until you have a chance to read that post and catch yourself up.
Okay, you're back. So, here's The Thing.
My friend, uh, kinda just stopped calling this guy a few months back. There was a convenient time for it (both of them took vacations), so when they both got back, they just stopped calling each other: Friend never called Guy; Guy never called Friend. They both basically just abruptly ended communication, with no explanation or anything.
Recently, Friend bumped into Guy again. They talk and stuff. It's a very pleasant evening, though neither of them appears to acknowledge that there's a strange lapse in time in their relationship.
Friend pretty much doesn't want to start a "Relationship" with Guy, but they did say they'd call each other (again, without mentioning the fact that they both failed to do so for months on end). It may be possible for them to be "just friends"... but maybe not.
Friend plans on calling Guy. What do they say? I was at a loss to advise Friend so I thought I'd toss it out there for you guys.
6 comments:
I would guess that the friend should invite the other guy to do something friendly. Like lunch, or coffee, or a trip to the zoo. I don't know, something along those lines.
In reality I wouldn't call. "I'll call you" is simply a way to end a conversation a lot of the time.
Why does Friend want to call Guy? It seems Friend was never that into Guy in the first place. (Yes, I did read the previous post that you linked to for history.)
Maybe Friend is really horny and just wants some more of that mediocre sex followed by fantastic naked cuddling? In which case, Friend should call, hookup, and leave it at that!
Question: Can or do gay men just lay it on the line with each other? Like if it's just a casual hook-up, do they say so and it's all good? Or is it similar to strait dating/hooking up where sometimes you "pretend" you want more, but it's really just a hookup followed by no phone calls?
Otherwise, considering the history and clashing issues, I can't imagine a reason why Friend wants to make that call.
I'll go with Katie here, although I agree with Modigli's analysis (could I be more non-committal? Oh yes).
It seems your friend is more intent on them being pals than really really good friends. If you...r friend wants to call the guy (as opposed to plans on), he should make it a friendly step and take it from there. If it's a matter of "I said I'd call so I will", you're one guy I want a date with. I mean your friend is.
Hmmm. If I was Friend, and I kinda liked Guy, I would go ahead and call, make plans, and basically play it by ear. Sorta non-committal either way, see? If it then seemed like both Friend and Guy were interested in kicking it up a notch, it'd probably be a good idea for Friend & Guy to be up-front and clear on said notch. Natch.
I'm collecting your responses and passing them along to the relevant person. Keep 'em coming!
Modig: I really wouldn't know the answer to your question, because it's been ages since I've ... well, let me just not complete that sentence and scratch that from the record completely, shall we?
heheheheeeeee!!!! ..... Fair enough.
I'm still curious about that question, though. Maybe all romantic relationships are the same, but I'm curious if they dynamics change with man/man (or woman/woman) -VS- man/woman.
Post a Comment